Wednesday, July 30, 2014

Bed Rest Chronicles

2 Days after my last post, on July 12th, I was admitted at Methodist Hospital in Brooklyn due to a "bloody" situation. The scare occurred after I had been climbing a chair to get on my kitchen counter to organize the top of my kitchen cabinets, which I had not been able to organize since we moved in April, but my mother and hubby had used the space to toss all the "misc. kitchen" stuff they didn't know what do with. For weeks I was losing my mind over it. Finally, a Saturday home alone, I made a plan and got to work. When I got up from the chair after feeding my daughter lunch, I realized something was terribly wrong.

I was admitted upon arrival. I was diagnosed with Placenta Previa - complete previa. That is when the placenta is really close to the cervix, which can lead to premature labor. My four day stay was much needed to observe the baby's heart beat and that I didn't have any contractions. I had the loveliest nurses (Hi Ashley! Hi Megan!). I spent my days attached to monitors and IV, I had so many holes poked in my I felt sore to my earlobes.

4 days later, I was finally released from the hospital. I couldn't wait to see my babies. Fortunately, I had my mom with me to care after me since I was on strict bed rest. I can't tell you just how hard that was for me. Not only was it hard for me not to pick up my daughter when she asked (I couldn't say no), I was also having a hard time not picking up after the kids or washing the 5 dishes in the sink. Everyone wanted me to relax. Sit still. Ask for help. Something sooo simple. And people willing to help, I couldn't do it. I was miss independent. Not!

Today, 3 weeks later, I am back in the hospital. Admitted for the second time for spotting. I felt defeated. I have gotten weaker since I feel huge and sleeping had become impossible. I was easily out of breath and quickly tired when walking from one room to another. But I couldn't sit still.

I'm a prayer, so I prayed to God that He keep my baby well (sanos, monitors and blood work say the little one is doing great) but this time my prayer was asking for forgiveness of my disobedience. I trusted that this had occurred with God's purpose and perfect will. I accepted my situation, I just had to live according to. Tonight, as I sit in my very little hospital bed. Sipping warm apple juice and trying to ignore my growling belly, I making my pact with God, that I will "sit still, and know that He is God".

I need to be well for my unborn child and for my beautiful children at home. For my hubby, who is not big on words, but embraced me at 5 am yesterday whispering to me that He couldn't lose me and needed me to be strong. I felt those words deep in my heart. I saw it on Jordan's face when I told him I was going back to the hospital. He always has a question about something, but this time he just stared at the TV. He was scared and didn't know how to express it. I have 6 very special people depending on me and I am simply depending on Him. I know everything will work out so long as I sit still...

Ok, sleep is finally sneaking up (its 1 am and I can't sleep!!) I will do us all a favor and get rest :)


Thursday, July 10, 2014

One More Makes Four

We are excitedly awaiting the arrival of our fourth child this upcoming September.

We certainly didn't expect this gift from God, so we feel truly blessed to receive another treasure. 

When we first learned we would be expanding our family yet again, Steven was in shock for about 5 months. I felt I popped right away, but it did take some time before a full belly appeared, and that's when he said "oh my God.. we are having another baby". When we told the kids (the older ones of course) they were elated. Their excitement, got me excited. Because to be honest, my original reaction was "but how??" 

How will I manage my time?
How will I manage the house?
How will I manage work? 
How will I manage the kids?
How will we afford 2 babies in diapers?? 
How will we ever save now?

Common "how" questions all expectant parents feel. But I didn't question God. And that is the only thing that got me going. I had to revert to Him and tell Him I trust that He will see us through this. And he hasn't failed me yet!

I'm about 7 months now. And I feel pretty good. The summer NYC heat does get to me and its been slowing me down, but I'm healthy. I'm giving my babies all the love and time that I do have now and hope they can adapt when new baby arrives. I'm also enjoying this process, as I know it will be my last. I hope to do what I didn't get to do with my other pregnancies this time around... maybe a family shoot in Central Park. A real nursery - now that I have space! I mean, small things that matter, at least to me. 

One thing we are trying to do differently this time... not learn about the gender until due day BUT I'm currently in a crazy nesting mode (ain't it obvious by my email above??) and I want to set up a really nice nursery for my peanut. I'm leaning towards a neutral palette, but I love color! So maybe I can incorporate some of that when baby arrives.... OR I can just get a peek and get decorating!? Ugh I can't decide!! Only 2 months left, I need to get a grip! lol


Honey: You Got Mail

I have a beautiful... growing family. I feel truly blessed to have a home with so much love. However, my biggest peeve besides the constant clutter I can't seem to make disappear - is the fact that my honey and I never get a chance to sit and talk without being interrupted by one of our kiddos. (heart them so).

It has become more and more frustrating as I always feel I have something to share and never get the opportunity to get his response. So while at work, when I have 5 minutes to think outside of "the box" - I'll shoot over emails like these:

Subject: Inspiration pt 2

I won't get preachy this time ;) ... 

Seeking out inspiration to get us through the next two years… (I would be willing to stay in Brooklyn ONE more year if we can achieve the following: paint a wall or two ;), organize our closet… and this:

This is EXACTLY what I wanted to pick at IKEA (the unites) I budget we can afford to fit 2 side by side cost $60 - $70 depends the width we decide.

As for the bins – we can get more of those 8 gallon boxes OR we can get the 10/16 gallon bins from IKEA with the easy access flip top that would be SO handy when trying to quickly get something from a bin (and putting things back). The white will also make the room feel bigger and neater.  (I think 5 of 10 g and 5 16g) would organize the stuff we have in storage quite nicely… well after my very needed garage sale (tbd!)

The linen closet (by the bathroom) could use some love and organizing too. Not interested in mounting shelves that may or may not hold up, so something like this would be perfect to organize blankets, toilet paper/paper towels and cleaning products – WHILE leaving us plenty of room in the back. Holler!

Note all of the very important information that I am stating in this email.
1. I always feel like i'm telling him what to do... this time, I promised to not do that. Not sure if my "tone" was successful lol thoughts?
2. I've been thinking about moving again next year, does he know that? probably not. But now he knows. And he also knows I'd be willing to stay put for a second year under a few conditions.
3. My conditions always cost money and DIY projects... which he is NOT a fan of. Oh darn.

Conclusion: our line of communication has been limited to emails. Now I know what online dating feels like. Oh wait... that's how we met. Never mind. ;)